Past Tense

It is common for new moms to hide their true stress levels and negative emotions from even their closest friends. They believe the pervasive cultural myth that all mothers are supposed to feel only loving, joyful emotions as they care for their new babies.

The internal belief that other people will perceive them as “bad” keeps too many mothers silent. They may choose to suffer quietly rather than risking strong judgements from friends and family or even having their babies taken away. Having a guideline to show what is normal and what isn’t can make all the difference in getting help to new mothers in difficult situations.

Mood swings, irritability, fatigue, persistent tearfulness, forgetfulness and anxiety are common symptoms in new mothers. The vast majority of birth mothers cope with some version of the “baby blues.” The good news is that these symptoms generally pass without any intervention within a couple of weeks. The postpartum mother’s’ body simply needs a little time to normalize the tremendous fluctuations in hormone levels after giving birth.

Sometimes the symptoms continue after the two week “baby blues” time frame, and are accompanied by additional challenges. Somewhere between 10% to 17% of new mothers may experience postpartum depression. They have to cope with all the previous symptoms plus feelings of vulnerability, depression, low self-esteem, hopelessness, decreased levels of daily functioning and severe mood swings. These women have a difficult journey, but they are not crazy.

Unreasonable fears, panic attacks, obsessions about cleanliness and germs, and visions of finding herself unable to stop something bad from happening to her baby may indicate a more severe postpartum mood disorder. Postpartum obsessive-compulsive disorder includes these symptoms along with all the previous ones. The level of intensity is amplified, but women with this disorder are still considered sane.

What about the women who get sensationalized on the news, the ones who think their babies are from the devil? We’ve all heard stories about new mothers who think they were told to hurt themselves or their babies. Can these women be sane?

This is the most severe end of the postpartum mood disorder spectrum, and where the break in sanity occurs. Fortunately, only 1 or 2 out of every thousand postpartum women will go through this disorder. Women with postpartum psychosis experience dangerious delusions, often in conjunction with visual and auditory hallucinations. They require immediate hospitalization in order to receive the necessary medical attention, and are not safe to care for their babies until the disorder is properly treated.

Here is a good rule of thumb: If a new mother is concerned about her well being and the well being of her child, if she is worried about the thoughts and emotions she experiences, she is still sane. Let’s take away the stigma of postpartum mood disorders and encourage new moms to be honest. All the symptoms described here are 100% treatable and help is available.